NaBloPoMo - Day 3 - River of Life

I had a very good online friend who I never met, but who meant a lot to me during a time in my life when I was facing a lot of decisions. I met him just before I was accepted to medical school, when I was making the difficult choice of taking a leap of faith and leaving my current career to start over in a new one.

One of the things that was a constant in our relationship was commenting on how life was a journey down a river.  There are smooth passages, rough passages, and the occasional waterfall. We commented on how your river journey might meet someone else's and then later you split off again. That was our story... our journeys merged for a short time and then we split again. Unfortunately, his journey ended when he died just before I moved from Minnesota to go start my residency in Buffalo.

Now that my mother's journey has ended, and I am continuing on my journey without her, I am starting to consider changing direction or maybe taking a side channel to a completely different river. It's like I've come to a big confluence of rivers and suddenly there's a lot of decisions that have to be made. It's a scary time, but also an exciting time... white water rafting can be fun too...

No Rest for the Wicked

If you can imagine, today was crazier than yesterday even though we  saw less patients.  But let's not dwell on that too much...

So, even though I don't have to have a post today for the A to Z Challenge, I thought it would be fun to share some of my favorite posts for those of you new to my blog site.

I have been blogging since 08/06/2007 when I was heading east from Minnesota to Buffalo.  My first blog was entitled "Do They Have Squirrels in Buffalo?" because I had developed quite the squirrel army on the property of our rental near White Bear Lake, and I was going to miss the daily goings-on of my little furry extended family.

That blog chronicled the first year of my Emergency Medicine residency and the adjustments I had to go through switching from a surgically-trained mind to an emergency medicine trained mind.  I finally got married to the man of my dreams in that year, and we went on a belated honeymoon.  I wrote about the different rotations I was having to do, and how some could be more painful than others.  Having a chance to cut... in surgery the theme was: a chance to cut is a chance to heal, and I do enjoy doing things more than talking about doing things.

The year went by, and I started gaining more responsibility as I started my second year.  Also, I started getting more snarky in my commentary, especially while working the children's hospital.  I started doing shifts with the Mercy Flight crew and wrote about my first helicopter ride.

I ended with a final post on 10/26/2008.

Next week, I'll post my favorites from my second blog: Buffalo Squirrels Won't You Come Out Tonight?

On the Threshold of a New Year...

My favorite author Tennyson one wrote:

"Hope smiles from the threshold of the year to come,

whispering "It will be happier..."

Last year at this time I was writing about my hopes and dreams for the upcoming year and thinking about my resolutions;  those I accomplished, those I didn't accomplish, and those I would set forth for the next year.  I wrote about career, travel and family.  I looked forward to a new dog, continuing work on our new home, and darn if that cheetah didn't elude me again.

But, all I have to do to remember the excitement and joy that this last year brought is to look at the over 3500 photos I took this year.  Albeit, about 1500 are probably devoted to just the dogs.  Within a year, we went from a 3 cat household to a three cat, two dog, two goat, two guinea, 13 chicken household.  And, that alone came with it's own share of joys and sadness.

We traveled:  from Tucson, Arizona to Mendocino, California.  Trips to Laughlin, San Francisco, Sacramento.  Disneyland for my birthday!  Camping during the summer to Lakeview, Oregon and down to Hat Creek following the fly boys.  Back to Medford and then down to my home town to get my mother who spent time at our home this year on two separate occasions.

The house got a new look from the outside as work continued.  And, we are so close to finally finishing one room.  Doesn't sound like much, but when you've got a massive home improvement project, it's one room at a time.

Career wise, I started doing shifts at the larger hospital in the area.  I continued as the pre-hospital coordinator and on the county emergency medical committee.  And, I've taken on several projects both in EMS and at my hospital which will continue to add to my leadership roles.  I'm still on several committees with my national organization, and continue to teach and lecture within my group.

As for next year...
 - to run a 5K.  One of my friends at work has challenged me to get back into running.  I've got new shoes.  I've got the Couch to 5K app on my iPhone.  I think I'm set.
 - to get more organized.  For some reason, I used to be the most organized OCD person ever, and that's been sorely lacking in a lot of areas.  I need to find my focus and get coordinated once again.
 - to finish a short story.  I've got so many ideas and partially started projects going that I know I need to stop and focus and finish one... that will lead to two... then three... wash, rinse, repeat
 - to continue to increase the presence of God in my life.  Not that I need any more projects, but to contribute more of my time to the Church.  If anything, to get back into the habit of daily prayer and meditation.
 - to eke out every last bit of joy and fun in the things I do.  We've got several trips planned, and I intend to make next year's photo count even bigger... which might mean I need a new MacBook... darn!
 - and to just lay the foundations for a healthier, happier me... I think that will do the most to change the way I live my life during the upcoming year...

Happy New Years, and may you achieve all your hopes and dreams!!

Welcome 2013!

myPod Shuffle #21 - Time After Time

In 1984 when this song came out, I was a junior in high school.  Over the years, this song came to mind whenever a relationship broke apart.  And, I think it had a lot to do with the video which I remember to this day.  A girl leaves home to be with her love, but he can't accept the changes that she undergoes.  She decides it's better to leave and move on, but he sees her leaving, and for a time makes her think that he is going with her.  Then, at the last minute, she has to go alone and find her new path in life.

In so many ways at times, this song paralleled what was happening in my own life.  I left home to go to college.  I left college to go back home.  I left home to go to D.C. and then to Mexico City.  I left there back to home.  Then to med school.  And, then, traveling around the country almost every year until I finally made it to here.  There were a lot of relationships along the way, but the most important ones seemed to relate to decisions I had to make about leaving and moving on.

In some ways, that's the problem with ambition.  What are you willing to give up for your own dreams?  What are you willing to sacrifice?  Up until the time I met my DH, I felt as though no one was going to hold me back.  I knew other girls who decided about med school, residency, etc. based on what their current significant other might want, or what they thought he might want, or what they hoped he might agree to.  I'd like to say I never made a decision based on someone else, but I'd be lying.  I think at some point someone affects you to the point you might make a decision based on their point of view and not your own.

I wonder sometimes where I might have ended up, but I think I made the right choice because here is where I'm enjoying being right now... with someone who isn't falling behind but staying caught up right along with me.