NaBloPoMo - Day 30 - Not an End but a Beginning

So another NaBloPoMo is complete. I managed to get in my 30 posts for the month (cheated just a little). As I think over the time between last year's completion and this year's, it's amazing how much has changed. I didn't ever imagine I would be where I am now. 

And, I already know that between this year's challenge and next year's there are many more changes that will be occurring, new places to visit, and new adventures to come. There's a big one that won't be coming for another 18 months, but today I was so excited to receive the guide books to help me start planning that journey:
The Camino of Santiago which I wrote about earlier this month.

And, now this month comes to a close. I'll see about writing more often, and I hope you'll continue with me on this journey.

We'll see what the next 12 months hold...

NaBloPoMo - Day 25 - Sneak Peek

This is all I'm allowed to show you.

I am pretty much done with the painting that I did for a friend of mine...

My first, hopefully not my only, commission.

It's pretty much done. Just a couple of touch ups

and I'll be ready to put the final coat on it

and give it to my friend.

I am very excited about it.

One of my mentors said it was "the best painting I've done to date..."

Oooh, can't wait for you all to see it...

Soon, very very soon....

NaBloPoMo - Day 10 - Writer's Block

So I was going to be writing this month for the #WriterInMotion challenge.

The picture above was given for inspiration.

A first draft was due 11/08, but I didn't get a story done in that time...

In fact, I got about 4 paragraphs done and then I had nothing...

I had a number of thoughts about this picture...

I heard some interesting ideas during one group discussion that I participated in.

I thought I could totally write something original...

but the words aren't coming.

I thought maybe this post I would share my few paragraphs with you and see what you think...

Maybe I'll be inspired to keep writing and share that during the next round due in about a week...

Here goes... don't be afraid to be brutal... I've been a surgery intern... I can take it... 

WIM:

Mariana ran as fast as she could through the darkened alleyway.  She stopped just before the cross street and leaned up against the wall catching her breath before daring to continue. Looking down at the flare she held in her hand she got a rush of confidence and took a deep breath before slowly glancing out to the street.

To her right, cars burned in the distance and the crowd seemed to have moved on. Looking to the left she saw an empty street made darker by several broken street lamps. Straight ahead, the unlit alley looked like a cave as it passed between several more of the downtown buildings. Mariana knew that to get to the fort she should go to the right, but she was trying to avoid the Civil Guards who were sweeping through the city herding everyone to the eastern end of town. She had a decision to make.

She crouched and eased onto the sidewalk and was about to take a step out onto the street to get a better view when to her left she heard a shout, “Hey you! Get over here!” She turned to see a couple of Civil Guards in their signature tan and red-trimmed uniforms holding automatic rifles heading toward her. Her decision was made for her. She quickly pulled the hood of her black shawl over her head and ran straight ahead into the darkness.

The expected gun shots never happened. Mariana dared initially to run right down the middle of the near pitch black alleyway hoping to avoid hitting or tripping over anything. God, it seemed to go on forever. She stopped when she finally started to be able to differentiate larger shapes in the gloom. She tucked behind a garbage bin trying to calm her breathing and listened for any sounds.

The night was strangely quiet given the activity happening now south and east of her. The flare gave her some comfort; almost like a totem that would carry her to safety. She wished she could light it to help guide her through the streets, but she needed it for later. For now, she had to continue on her mission.

Before moving again, she listened long and hard: no footsteps, no voices, no more gunshots. Mariana felt safe enough to leave her resting spot and continued on down the alleyway, now staying more along the walls and in the shadows of the increasing light from the next cross street. Once again she slowed down as she got closer to the end of the alley way and then slinked along the wall on her right before stopping to rest just before the intersection.

The Mid 40's are in the Books

For some reason I never got around to writing about traveling to National Parks numbers 44, 45 and now 46...!

Back at the end of June we visited Olympic National Park (#44) in Washington.  There are actually two parts: a rainforest/coastal part and then the more alpine mountain park.

Both have their own intrinsic beauty.  It was amazing to be able to spend time in both places.

Then we drove north to catch a ferry to get us across the waters of the sound...

The next day we arrived at Cascades National Park (#45).  The visitor's center wasn't much but the drive through the park was full of large vistas of mountains and trees.  Lots of small streams and rivers.

Then there was this:

I called it Heaven on Earth.  Almost as beautiful as the first time I saw Glacier National Park... almost...

Then, this last weekend I met my best friend from medical school, and we spent the weekend at Rocky Mountain National Park (#46).  It was the last national park I had to check off my list in Colorado.  So worth the wait... and the trip!

As my friend said, photos in no way do justice to the beauty of the scenery.

We saw so many animals including a moose and baby.

Elk on the slopes of the mountains.

Meadows reaching up to the skies.

My friend is a fan of waterfalls, so we did a bit of hiking.

Kinda rough given the base elevation was about 9,000 feet,

but with her encouragement I tramped on and up.

So glad I did.

Another beautiful place checked off! 

Birthday Month Shuffle - 7th Edition Day 17

Isn't it amazing how some people come into your life and completely and utterly change it.  That's even double for someone young that you take under your wing for several weeks and hope that you've made some kind of impact in their life.  Then, at some point, you realize it's them that made the impact in your life.  And, when they're gone, it's like a part of you went with them.

This is dedicated to that special young lady who probably doesn't realize how special she really is, but I'm hoping that she'll realize it and all of her dreams... just don't grow up too fast...

Birthday Month Shuffle - 7th Edition Day 10

Is this what acceptance is like...?

I can't believe I forgot the Thirdaversary of my mom's death two days ago!

I've been very candid about my feelings and grief on this blog.

Sharing my depression and suicidality without shame or fear of judgement

because a lot of my friends are sharing similar loss as we age

and our parents begin to die.

Of course, we all are unique in our suffering because we all have different stories

to share about our relationships with our mothers.

But still... to have already forgotten a significant date!

I guess time and the world does move on...

So today I'll share this song from my iPod...

a song about going through challenges and making it to the other side...

dedicated to all the moms that have gone before us

and are waiting for us on the river's edge...

Birthday Month Shuffle - 7th Edition Day 5

I've been thinking a lot about my relationship with God recently.  My mother was very religious.  She followed church doctrine down to the letter.  Me, not so much.

I believe in God.  I believe in a Heaven and a Hell.  I believe and worship the Virgin Mary and the saints.  I pray daily and try to make good choices in my daily life.  I used to go to church with my Momma, but since she died I've only been once... at her funeral.

Today the shuffle brought up U2's "Vertigo;" a song thought to be about temptation and telling God how They are the beacon out of temptation.  Freedom from sin and redemption and salvation.

I wish I had my mother's faith.  I wish I had her devotion.  She encourage me to always put God first.  And, I think in some ways I still do.  It's been difficult since she's died to see the plan that God has for me, but I know I have to.  A few other incidents professionally have made me question His plan, but I know there's a reason for everything.  I just have to be patient... and that's the hardest part.

Birthday Month Shuffle - 7th Edition Day 4

"I just wanna see you be brave..."

I have this on my cycling mix, and even though I

haven't cycled as much as I would like,

I still think of those challenging hills,

or final miles of a long ride

whenever this song comes on.

Happy 4th of July!!

Thank you to all those that were

BRAVE!

in defending our country...

Original posting 2016

K is for Kite Boarding

 

So my hubby likes to kite board.  It’s where you get on a flat board and get pulled along by a large kite across the water... or snow... or sand... depends on the weather and your terrain.  He’s a bit of a daredevil... or was.

One thing about getting older is those things you loved to do to be challenged somehow seem scarier, and it’s more of a challenge to even think about attempting them again.  Like hang gliding... yeah, my hubby used to do that too.  But after a somewhat serious crash, he hasn’t quite gotten up the nerve to try again.

Oh sure, he pulls his hang glider out, wipes it down, checks all the lines, makes sure all the mechanical parts are working well, and then he puts it back up again. No plans for a trip. No, hey let’s join the group over in Lassen, or Woodrat, or along the coast.  Sure we stopped at Point of the Mountain in Utah last summer to watch the hang gliders and paragliders, but he didn’t think about bringing his hang glider, nor has he talked about making another trip out there.

I’m like that too.  I have a snowboard I haven’t really used since before I left residency in Buffalo... almost 9 years ago.  Sure it’s in the attic... along with my boots, helmet, day bag, etc.  I think about going sometimes.  I think about the challenge of the mountain and how fun it would be to be standing on top of Heavenly again looking down at the lake... and then I think about my knees, and my feet, and how I’d probably be out of breathe getting off the chair lift...

Getting older sucks...

Birthday Shuffle Sixth Edition - Day 24

You know those songs from your college days

that made you feel as though life was the best ever

and dancing would go on all night until

you thought your legs would fall off...?

That kind of song... 

that's the kind of song I love

on my cycling playlist.

Because it reminds me of being young

and full of energy

and being able to dance until the morning came

and sometimes you need that

when you have been riding all morning

and you need to find that little bit of something

to just make it all over that next hill...

That's why this song is on my playlist.

Birthday Shuffle Sixth Edition - Day 18

I know this song is all about expectations,

but this is a song I like to hear somewhere

around the middle of a long ride...

when I am starting to feel Numb.

On short 20 - 30 mile rides,

I know what my body needs to keep functioning

and keep cycling, but I am still learning

what I need to do to keep my knees from freezing

and locking up,

and what I need to do so I don't feel

like my lungs are going to explode

on those longer rides.

Or especially in the middle of a long incline...

I hate long inclines.

Are you watching the Tour de France...?

I have watched it the last 2 years.

It's inspirational even though I know

I will never be at their level.

I kinda wish I had watched it as a kid

because it definitely would have been

inspiring then, and maybe I would have

trained more and done more when I was younger...

Anyway, this was their stage profile from yesterday... yikes!

And this was their final climb... eek!

We have some hills nearby which are similar,

and I am med control for a local race

the Tour of the Unknown Coast...

This is not something I would want to do on a bike...

Talk about feeling numb...

Birthday Shuffle Sixth Edition - Day 16

the first one...

It's amazing how easy it is to feel as if you can't do something.

It's also amazing how many people will make you feel bad 

about something as you're doing it.

Like Meghan Trainor says,

"Yeah it's pretty clear I ain't no size 2..."

And, I can pretty much say you start to feel

very vulnerable when you put on those

cycling clothes for the first time. 

     

Which is why I like songs like today's shuffle pick

"Titanium" by David Guetta & Sia

  

Just when you're starting to feel frustrated

and as if you aren't really accomplishing anything

this song will come on...

And those people making fun of you on your bike

don't matter, because in your head you're thinking,

"Yeah, but can you do this...?"

or this....?

Cause I can...

and I did....

and I do...

"I'm bulletproof, nothing to lose

Fire away, fire away

Ricochet, you take your aim

Fire away, fire away

You shoot me down but I won't fall

I am titanium

You shoot me down but I won't fall

I am titanium..."

Birthday Shuffle Sixth Edition - Day 4

Given that it's the Fourth of July,

I am going off the shuffle for a day to bring up

one of the other songs in my playlist:

I have a lot of songs on my playlist that are for inspiration.

Especially when I face new challenges.

In comparison to how far I've come,

10 miles doesn't seem very far... 

but it was the climb that was the challenge.

This was one of my first ones...

I call these "lung vomit hills"

because I honestly feel like my lungs are going to burst

up out of my throat...

Songs like this one, and some others in my playlist

really help.

And of course add to the celebration

when you get to the other side

and race downhill...!

Birthday Shuffle Sixth Edition - Day 3

I've known my friend Melinda since college.

Just recently, we've both started riding separately

and earlier this year for the first time together...

50 miles, crazy elevations...

I think about her because of the next song in my shuffle:

"Tainted Love" is one of the soundtracks of my college days.

I love hearing it when it comes on during my ride.

It reminds me of being 20 and carefree.

Dancing all night as though my legs could go on forever...

I need that little inspiration sometimes on a ride.

Especially when faced with a challenge like this one:

Nature Photo Challenge, Day 6

#6 - When I first moved to Humboldt County, I spent a lot of my free time exploring the area. One day, I drove up to Patrick's Point near Trinidad, CA. I got there early in the morning, and thought my photo shoot was going to be a bust as it was very foggy. But, then suddenly, light started shining in... and made for some great photos, of which this is one...

Nature Photo Challenge, Day 3

Day 3: When I take my camera out for a day of shooting, I try to find the unusual shot or angle. Sure, I'll take a picture of a famous landmark, but I'll always try to find a new angle or frame for it... but I also look for photos in the minutiae... like this small mushroom jutting out of the moss... while everyone else was looking up, I was looking down, and found a magical little world.

Nature Photo Challenge, Day 2

Day two of an online photo challenge on Facebook:

There's something about logs on the beach that I love to photograph. I like their texture. I like to imagine their story of how they traveled from some wooded area and fell into a river, then were carried downstream to the ocean where they might have floated a long distance before landing on the beach. They might even still float away at high tide to another destination.

Nature Photo Challenge, Day 1

A photography friend nominated me to complete a 

nature photo challenge for the next week,

so I thought I would share my photos, some of which I've post before,

and some of which I haven't.

Enjoy!

Birthday Shuffle Year V - Day Two - Geronimo

Music has always been a part of what I do.

Writing, working, riding my bike...

This song by Sheppard has become a sort of "war cry" for me

during this time that I've been cycling and training.

It's got a good beat that I can do my cadence training to.

And, the lyrics...

As a kid, did you ever see the cartoons where when someone

was about to do something scary, they would yell out

"Geronimo!" right before they did it?

That's how I felt about cycling.

Unfamiliar, challenging, kinda scary.

But, I pulled up my biking shorts,

plugged in my iPod, 

and rode...

Thinking "Geronimo!" whenever 

I faced my next challenge...

#losethepannus

Technically, it's the panniculus,

but most medical folk know it as the pannus...

And, some time in March of this year

I decided to finally wage a strong battle against it.

So far, I think I might be winning...

Earlier that month, I came back from two back to back trips:

one to New Orleans and another on a two week cruise.

If either of those doesn't scream out LOTS of GOOD FOOD to some of you, 

then you've got some traveling to do.

But, I digress...

Much to my chagrin, after these two trips despite my best efforts

to get in lots of walking and, at least, an occasional trip to the workout room,

I came back to find none of my clothes fit me comfortably.

Even my scrubs were a bit on the tight side.

So I did something I've only done like 4 times in my adult life...

I weighed myself.

Now, I like using kilograms because as a physician we

use the metric system all the time.

Plus, when you see 70kg on a scale, it doesn't seem so scary.

Imagine my consternation when I made the conversion from

kilos to pounds (multiple by 2.2)....!!!

Yikes!!

I was very close to the 200 pound mark.

When did that happen??

And, how did it happen so easily??

Well, I am sure this had a lot to do with it,

but now I really needed to do something about it...

So I bought a bike:

Now, I know nothing about bikes, so all I asked for was:

something that was a road bike, not a mountain bike

something that didn't weigh a lot

something that was middle range in price

and something that would be durable.

After trying out different models and seats,

I ended up with a Fuji Absolute

So I went on my first ride in Folsom where I stay when I work in Sacramento...

I planned out a route and thought,

seriously, how hard could five miles be?

Almost immediately I thought I was going to die

either from a heart attack or due to my thighs exploding

from the strain...

and I hadn't even gotten to the hilly part yet.

But I made it through that ride... 

note that GoogleMaps says

I should make the ride in 30 minutes... 

yeah, right...

Not fully discouraged, I kept riding and came up with the hashtag

#losethepannus

both as a tongue-in-cheek inspiration for weight loss, but also because

having something hitting/resting on the top of your thighs

when you're riding is not conducive to good cycling form

and definitely slows you down.

So I rode:

And, I rode:

And, I rode:

Building up some distance...

And pushing myself farther:

Then came the hills.  I christened this one

"Lung Vomit Hill"

The distance wasn't so long, but check out the grade at the beginning..

I seriously was going to raise my arms above my head 

and cheer when I made it to the top!

But my lungs and thighs were on fire,

and I think I might have been hallucinating the 

"Rocky" theme song at that point.

Once I was back home on the coast, I took to our local country roads...

And found that I had a perfect route for some interval training...

And, then, I became "that person" 

You know, the one that takes their bike on vacation...

And, I challenged myself to this ride...

At the top... ouch...

which screamed for this hash tag

#anotherlungvomithill

Then I went and did it... 

I bought bike shorts.

I was starting to consistently ride close to 10 miles,

and I started to notice around mile 7 that my butt was getting kinda sore.

So, I made the investment.  And, my ischial tuberosities thank me...

As I've progressed in distance, my DH has become

part of my support team.  He offers to drive me places

so that I can get in a longer ride...

Like cycling down the Avenue of the Giants...

There were some challenging hills on that route...

He also challenged me by offering to buy me lunch...

if I rode my bike into town...

the extra 30 minutes on my time is because of

Loleta Hill which is

#anotherlungvomithill

but those extra 1097 calories burned were so worth it

because let's be honest...

I love to eat..!

A couple of days ago, he dropped me off on the highway

so I could do this ride from Scotia to home...

Those three bumps you see below on the elevation chart 

are the "Three Sisters"

with yet another "Lung Vomit" hill...

So, after three months, the pannus is slowly shrinking,

clothes are fitting better again,

I've been able to work off a lot of recent personal stress,

and my bike and I seem to suddenly be getting invited to a lot of places.

Locally, there's a 30 mile ride through a lot of the same

routes I've been riding while at home which I've challenged 

myself to do in October.

My best friend from college has challenged me to

do a 50 mile ride with her in January in a town just east of San Diego...

and, I actually registered for it...!

And, who knows, maybe a year from now, I'll be able to ride a part of the 

Tour of the Unknown Coast as a cyclist and not just as medical support...