TYOFWM - Christmas Holidays

I made it through Christmas. I made it...

There was a moment there I thought I was going to lose it. I thought about Momma and just a year ago sitting at home, opening gifts... an earring and necklace set from her favorite store which she never got to wear, which I now wear... some sugar free chocolates from our local candy shop which she didn’t really get to eat and which my husband ended up eating... sitting around, laughing, looking forward to the cruise in a few weeks which she never got to go on... and, me, sitting at a restaurant on board another cruise ship, drinking a glass of wine while looking at the sunset, remembering... tears just beginning to well and that weird lump in your throat that you get... and trying to hold it together.

December 25, 2018... Christmas... She fell just 5 days later, and that was the beginning of the end... just five more days of normalcy. Five more days of having her completely in my life. Five more days at home until she returned four months later to die... this is one anniversary I am not looking forward to.

But, for now, I will savor in the fact that I made it through Christmas without having a total melt down. Taking this trip was a blessing in a lot of ways. No sitting around the house thinking of her... seeing her everywhere yet feeling her absence... I made it through... 

Now the rest of the Year of Firsts Without Momma will begin... all the way through to the anniversary of her death, and what would have been her 82nd birthday... both of which I will be celebrating at sea... on the Pacific... which supposedly has no memory... but I’ll be bringing plenty of mine to share...

O is for Ocean

"They say the Pacific has no memory..."

That's a quote out of one of my favorite movies:

"The Shawshank Redemption."

I, on the other hand, have a lot of memories about the Pacific Ocean.

I grew up in SoCal, and some of my first memories are about

playing on the warm sands of Huntington Beach.

My uncle took me fishing off the coasts of Dana Point and Newport.

In high school, all the cool kids laid out on the beach between the Newport

and Balboa piers.

Then I went to college...

in San Diego...

and spent a whole LOT of time on the beach.

I learned to sail in the Pacific.

I did a grunion run.

I kissed a lot a few boys on those warm beaches.

I've flown kites, ridden bikes, and played volleyball.

I've seen a lot of sunsets, and a number of sunrises, over the Pacific.

I've seen the Pacific from the locks of the Panama Canal

as I sailed underneath the Bridge of the Americas,

and have sailed the coastline all the way north to the shores of Homer, Alaska.

Last year, we did the ultimate:

a 40 day cruise from Australia to San Diego.

There were so many sea days,

and we saw the Pacific in all of its moods - 

stormy, calm, sunny, gray, bright blue and deep black.

I have wondered in the whales who breached alongside my boat,

watched dolphins swim along in my wake.

I have swum with rays and sharks,

followed a turtle along the shore,

fed garibaldi and angel fish.

I have collected shells of all types.

It may not have a memory of me,

but I certainly have a lot of memories of it and all its wonders.

Winding Roads, Winding Stories

My mother is here visiting for about three weeks.  Today I decided to take her for a drive along the 30 mile road to Petrolia.  I've been down this road many times, especially since I have been doing medical support for the Tour of the Unknown Coast century bike race.  And, I first wrote about it when we initially moved here almost 4 years ago now.

Now with the new Jeep, it was time to take the road again...

And it was so worth it, if just for the views...

Looking North toward Cape Medocino

the Westernmost point in the lower 48

Mattole River meeting the Pacific Ocean at

Mattole Beach

This Jeep will go anywhere...!

We then continued along the road to Honeydew which eventually

ends up at Rockefeller Redwood State Park...

Aren't these trees amazing...?

It's one of my favorite drives.

Here's the view looking up through

the sunroof... 

All in all an amazing way to enjoy

a nice drive,

and spend some quality time

with my mom...

NaBloPoMo Day 2 - Favorite Place

Today's prompt asks "If you could live anywhere where would it be?"

I think I've always said I wanted to live where the redwoods meet the Pacific...

So I guess I am Home.

I always imagined having a house where I could see the ocean, and a place to walk along the beach.

So I guess I am Home.

I wanted a house with some property where I could have lots of animals to enjoy.

So I guess I am Home.

And one day... it will be the home of my dreams...

NaBloPoMo Day 24

Sometimes you just have to take a leap of faith.... or a walk around a corner....

For the last several weeks, my DH has been walking the local beach.  I've joined him, as I've written, on several occasions.  At the south end of the beach is an outcropping.  My DH would tell me how the tide is never down enough to allow walking around it, and how he almost got washed off of it while standing on it.

Today we went for our usual walk and the tide was down.  He told me not to go around it.  He warned me not to go around it, but as the photos show I really didn't listen to him.  The beach and cliffs were even more beautiful than I imagined would be just around that corner.  You could almost imagine you were alone on the edge of the world.

Of course, a set of waves rolled up higher than I imagined, and I got wet from the knees down... but as I ran around the out-cropping back to my DH who was just shaking his head at my capriciousness, all I could think was that it was so worth it....

A Day at the Beach

 Yep, you can drive right down to the shoreline... no problem with 4-wheel drive...

  Lots of trees and branches washed up on shore...

  

A rock..?  No, it's actually part of a large tree stump that washed up on the beach after having been submerged for a long time... you could see barnacles and shells from other sea life on it.

  I love the ocean... I love the Pacific... 

  

Now I've got a front row seat...

  

One of my hubby's friends has an even better seat, though!