Most of the time I am thinking about all the things I have to do when I get home; making lists of things I need, things the critters need, things the hubby needs, etc. Some of the time I spend thinking of various scenarios and plots for the book, stage play and TV pilot I am planning to sit down and start writing.... someday...
Actually, on one of our recent trips to Sacramento, my hubby and I talked out a solution to the problem I was having with one of my characters in a story he is very interested to have me start writing since it's based on a dream I had about him... nothing sexy mind you, just your basic "serial killer has my husband held captive" type dream.
Somehow, though, on this last trip home, I found myself thinking about a friend from back home who is battling alcohol addiction. This got me thinking about things I post on Facebook. Should I feel bad about posting pictures of alcohol, drinking, glasses of wine, parties, etc? Should I ask her how she feels about my posting them? Do I think she even really reads any of my posts and might not have noticed them? I mean, seriously, over 400 friends on Facebook, do we really read every single posting?
While mulling that over, my mind started drifting to the 12 Steps of AA. You know, you work your way through the list as you work your way through your addiction. One of the steps, somewhere around #8, you make a list of all the persons you have harmed. Which made me think about "My Name is Earl" and his thoughts on Karma. Which got me thinking about people I might have affected negatively in some way in my life:
- the girl in high school who we unfriended because of the way she ate her hard-boiled eggs
- the guy in college who started dating my high school friend
- the other guy in college whose heart I broke
- the girl at work who I got fired
- any number of patients over the years
Sure, I could try to justify why I did the things I did. And, I'm sure the justifications might even be appropriate. But, it doesn't mean I still don't feel bad about what happened. I mean, seriously, I graduated from high school in 1985 and college in 1990, and I can still tell you the names of these people, the circumstances under which the event happened, etc. And, I'm sure we've all had someone in our life whom we've wronged... And, the bigger question I thought about is what can I do about this now, and what's it really going to matter...?
I guess just like I heard somewhere once we just "keep on movin' on..." and try to learn to be better people.
2 comments:
That is a lot of time to pursue thoughts; glad sometimes you aren't traveling alone and hubby is with you. I think you should post whatever you want on FB or blogs regardless of who is reading or what they may be facing; you wouldn't be the only exposure they would have to things they might be fighting; just my not so humble opinion.
betty
Don't you love the randomness of the thought process?
My husband told me recently that he had an opportunity to apologize to a guy he was mean to in high school (I'm not sure I even believe it - Kelsey is not possessed of a mean bone anywhere). The man thanked him but said he didn't remember the incident. You never know what sticks in someone's memory, and you never know what doesn't.
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